you learn from your mistakes

Well Ryan and I made our first mistake parenting. I don't know if you would even call it a mistake. Well we had started pretty much right when Kale came home I would pump and Ryan would get up with Kale once during the night and feed him my pumped milk. We also gave Kale a passy and everything was going great. No problems. Well when Ryan's mom came into town I wanted to visit with her and she watched Kale and let us get out of the house well I stopped pumping like I should and so we had to go to formula and we fed Kale formula. Well even after she left this continued and we did it some when Ryan was watching Kale because like I said I wasn't pumping like I should. Well the week after his mom left Kale started acting really funny about breastfeeding. He was not taking to my boob like he had been and he would pitch fits and really fight me. So ofcourse I didn't want my little boy to go hungry so we would feed him formula. Well when I finally got around to pumping again after things settled after Ryan's mom left, I pumped and noticed I wasn't getting the five ounces I was in one sitting. I was not even getting an once and that included from both boobs. I started crying and was really upset and mad at myself for letting this happen. Well we tried to get my milk back and it just wasn't coming back. Kale was not having the poopy diapers he should be having and was so fussy at night. We thought that maybe he was collicy but once he started not having any poopy diapers for two days I knew that he wasn't getting enough. We had taken him off formula and weren't feeding him any bottles. Well he started to act like he was really hungry so I caved in and fed him a bottle and then another one. It was like we had a completely different baby. He was not fussy at all that night. He went from crying from 9-12 on and off and not going down till 12 to he went to bed at nine that night. Well yesterday I was reading one of my breastfeeding books that I did not read before I started breastfeeding or while I was pregnant like I should have done. I came to realize I had given him nipple confusion you should not give them a bottle or passy until at least after six weeks from what my book said and also it said if he was not getting enough it could lead to dehydration and if he did become dehydrated he might end up in the hospital and it could cause permanent damage. After reading that I made a decision to feed him formula. I am very disappointed in myself for letting this happen, but there is nothing I can do about it now. You learn from your mistakes and at least with the next baby I will know no passy's and no bottles until after six weeks. I hate that he is not going to get my breast milk because I know that is best and I could just hit myself over the head but I messed up and I just have to deal with it now. He is not taking formula bad though, he wasn't gassy at all yesterday and he was gassy with my breastmilk. He did spit up a little bit which he barely did with me breastfeeding, but I don't want my little man to starve so I made a choice.

It is crazy, but that is exactly what was making him a fussy baby. Ryan kept telling him he had collic and I knew he didn't. I knew he was still hungry but Ryan didn't want to give him bottles or formula and so I went with it for a couple days. Since we have switched him to formula and it has only been one day it seriously is like we have a new baby. He is not fussy. He only cries when he needs something. Last night he went down at 9:45 and he slept until 4:30. We were so proud of him! I mean that is so good for a newborn baby. I was so impressed! With him going to bed earlier he doesn't sleep in as late but he still sleeps in pretty good. He sleeps on and off until about 9. At nine he is ready to be up and does not want to go back to sleep. He is up and ready to spend time with his mommy.